Depressed Yes.. Amazing Husband YES!

While I have been very depressed, I have also had a very hard time getting my thoughts together.  It's not like this isn't a place I haven't been in before, yes it is a little different considering I actually was pregnant and know the feeling, but the thought of not having mine own children isn't new.  I do not know where to go from here, but I was finally able to get some thoughts together and my wonderful husband and I went out last night for date night and had a really good talk.  

Bottom line, I have always felt guilty that my amazing man may not be a father, that we had talked about before and after we walked away from IVF I came to terms with the fact that he loved me and he was in this with me - whether we ever have kids or not.  Well after the miscarriage, those thoughts came back, that possibly, he has felt what the possibility feels like and may be changing his mind about wanting to be with me, perhaps it'd be easier to leave me and find someone who can give him a child and the life we had in mind.  

Well, I love my husband and I always have but last night he told me, 'better or worse, you are mine and I am all about you,'... there were many more sweet quotes but all were along those lines.  He wants us to enjoy our lives and our marriage and keep our faith.  He understands that I am struggling but he has faith in me as well that I will come out of this.  I could not be more lucky to have him as a husband and I pray that all those struggling with infertility... or any struggles have a partner by their side like my husband, everyone deserves a man (or woman) like him, and I am a very lucky girl.  

Well after having way too many drinks last night (especially considering we both had to work today..) we went home and I just happened to take an ovulation predictor kit, and turns out, I'm ovulating.. so looks like I know what we will be doing tonight.. no pressure. 

Keep the faith, and always pray.  We are.